incestophile

Most people experience attraction, whether it be sexual, romantic, platonic, and so many more types of attractions, which is why I believe that most people are paraphiles, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. I'm a paraphile. You, the person reading this, is most likely a paraphile.

Paraphiles are just people with attractions. Nothing more, and nothing less.

Most people don’t know what a paraphile is, and when they do hear these words, they immediately think pedophile, zoophile, necrophile, and/or biastophile and assume these people have harmed the people and/or things they are attracted to, but would never assume any other paraphile have abused people and/or things they’re attracted to, and that’s just not fair. You wouldn’t tell people that all pygophiles are bad. Do you even know what a pygophile is? It’s someone who is attracted to butts. The age old question, ‘Are you a tits or ass kind of person’ is a question dealing with paraphilias. Mammagymnophilia, also known as mastofact and mazophilia, is the attraction to breasts.

“Well, those are just harmless body parts. No one should be thinking about children, animals, dead bodies, and rape in a sexual manner?”

Human sexuality isn’t as black and white as you think it is. Humans have been showcasing their taboo attractions through art for years, and thankfully, it’ll never stop happening. These are expressions that must be talked about, or it’ll eat people from the inside out. Talking about things that get you off doesn’t harm others, it’s actions that do. If you don’t want to hear about these fantasies, that’s perfectly valid, but to tell others that they can’t talk about their feelings only causes harm.

Speaking of harm, to categorize paraphilias as a disorder only causes harm. The DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) categorizes paraphilias as a mental disorder, which isn’t right. Are there some people who have impulsive urges regarding their paraphilias? Yes, but very few. To use them as an example for all paraphilias is a disservice.

“Pedophiles, zoophiles, and necrophiles are bad because I heard stories where they have abused kids, animals, and corpses!”

For the philia in that paraphilia to count, the person must be attracted to that person and/or thing.

Most of the time, when you hear about someone sexually assaulting a child, they aren’t even pedophiles because they aren’t attracted to children, they simply want power over them. Even if that person was attracted to the child they abused, that doesn’t mean that their paraphilia made them do it. This goes for all paraphilias.

The reasons why an adult and a child can’t be together is because of a very big power imbalances (most relationships will have some kind of power imbalance, but not in this great of a scale), and that a child can’t physically or mentally handle a sexual and/or romantic relationship (though, this isn’t to say that children are innocent little angels who don’t have sexual fantasies, pleasure themselves or have sex. Many kids have sex with other kids, and that’s okay! I lost my virginity to another child when I was eight years old), but that doesn’t mean adults and children can’t have a platonic relationship. I don’t see why a MAP (minor attracted person) and an AAM (adult attracted minor) couldn’t be friends. I’m absolutely for minor liberation, and there are discussions to be had about children and their sexual and/or romantic freedoms that I would love to have.

Many zoos are in relationships with animals and don’t abuse them. A friend of mine is in a romantic relationship with her female pit bull. They go on dates, look out for each other, and never do anything that can’t be properly communicated to with the other.

For necros, I believe that if someone gives someone their consent before dying that they can have their body, then it’s okay if they want their body in a sexual and/or romantic way.

“But what about biastophiles? Is it really okay for people to fantasize and get off to thoughts of rape?”

Absolutely it is. Rape fantasies are normal, any psychologist will tell you that. People have been fantasizing about rape since forever, and people have been fantasizing about being raped (autobiastophiles) since forever. Consensual non-consent (CNC) is a healthy outlet for these fantasies.

Speaking of outlets, many people have been trying to help paraphiles with impulses who can’t ethically play out their fantasies in a satisfying manner. Many people have suggested sex dolls of children who are their age of attraction, and AI generated porn to masturbate to, but because, with the current state of AI, the porn would have to be made using real CSAM/CSEM, which is unfortunate, but people could have worked on these things so that no one would be hurt in the process, but people pearl-clutched too hard, and these ideas were scrapped, which is a horrible shame because these are harm reduction tools. They are things that some people need to not hurt themselves and others, and everyone is entitled to things that would make life easier, better, and worth living. Or at least, they should be.

"Isn't this just an admission that these paraphilias are harmful if they need harm reduction tools?"

Anything can be harmful. Absolutely everything could hurt you. I just want everyone to be themselves freely, to live their lives without shame, and others constantly bombarding them with harassment.

Written stories and art that feature adult/child relationships, or any other paraphilias, and/or roleplaying are recommended by trained psychologists for anyone who is seeking a way to indulge these fantasies. Though, fiction isn’t only used for harm reduction, it can absolutely be used for fun. There’s nothing wrong with indulging in fiction for fun, fantasies and/or kink. Fiction is a playground.

Destigmatizing paraphilias would also help queer people in the long run. Actually, it would help everyone, really, but the focus right now is on queer people because queer people are the most likely to be accused of being predators. Most likely, but not the only ones. Many people think they can shut down a conversation by accusing the other person of being a predator. Though, most of the time, they use the word ‘pedophile,’ and not predator. These two words are not synonymous, though many people don’t bother to use the right word. Words have power, and people have had their lives ruined or ended over something that isn’t deserving of that. No one deserves to die, and there is nothing wrong with being a paraphile.

Many people, even people who are in support of paraphiles, use the term ‘harmful paraphilias,’ but there is no such thing. No paraphilia is harmful because a paraphilia is simply an attraction, and an attraction is not an action.

I’m rambling. It’s what I do. I have much to say, and can’t speak them as eloquently as I’d like. Thanks, ADHD. So, fuck it, this is a mess, but these are my true feelings.

The internet is becoming more and more ‘family friendly,’ and I’m not being hyperbolic when I say that I truly believe that ‘family friendly’ is just a puritanical dog whistle. Puritanism and fascism are two sides of the same coin, and because people can’t see that, that’s why the internet is going to shit. That and antis. Antis, while not the majority, are definitely the loudest and most obnoxious. They’re the first to attack creators and scare people away from making the art they want to and want to strip peoples’ express and bodily autonomy away, all in the name of children.

Oh, who will think of the children?

They don’t care about children. Children are nothing, but shields to them. Who would argue against protecting kids? But this isn’t about protecting kids, it’s about censoring anyone who isn’t a strict puritan.

You’ve probably noticed, or at the very least, I hope you’ve noticed, that the internet is slowly, but surely becoming more and more censored and puritanical and I really hope that bothers you as much as it bothers me. Censorship is evil, and in the end it helps no one. Now, I’m not saying that you have to look at everything that squicks or triggers you, but you need to acknowledge that these things exist, and not everyone will be uncomfortable with the things that make you uncomfortable, that people will love them, and the things you can’t stand to look at still deserve to exist because if things and people you don’t like must be purged, then the things you enjoy and love can be purged, too.

Though, this seems to only happen with things of a sexual nature. Violent, gorey things, however, never get seen as transgressive because puritan and fascists are violent. They want to hurt people because the deification of violence is rooted in religion, and the love of anything sexual is not. People are so loudly and fiercely determined to prove that they aren’t degenerates that they’ll scream from the rooftops that they’ll hunt down anyone who is, even if that person actually isn’t, they just aren’t as pious as them.

The whole ‘kill your local pedophile’ and ‘kill your local rapist’ are two amazing examples of this. In my last essays, I explained that the term pedophile is an umbrella term that is simply someone who is sexually and/or romantically attracted to children. It’s an attraction, and nothing more, but these people who scream KYLP don’t care about that, they just believe that simply having the attraction is proof enough that that person deserves to die, and that’s wrong. No one deserves to die. Saying that anyone deserves to die is fascist, and will give people the grounds to harm anyone they want. You are not the judge, jury and executioner to others. If you’re allowed to harm anyone you don’t like, then others are allowed to harm you, for any reason, and I don’t want that. I don’t want anyone to be harmed, I want people to chill the fuck out.

You probably read this, thinking, ‘oh, this person is just a freaky pervert,’ and you’re right, I am, and I deserve to exist and feel safe just like everyone else.